my pain and misery returns

"they say the beast inside of me is gonna getcha.. getcha again" -Type 0 Negative.

I hate Dave so bad right now. I want to be his friend but my fucked up lil' mind was starting to think that we were getting closer again and might go back out again, but right now I just want to tell him fuck u. I want to ring his fucking neck like I have wanted to many times before. I hate him so bad b/c Ihave "loved him to death" and he gives me so much shit back. He got a new gf, guess who the fuck it is?!!! Ashley that fucking girl that he was thinking about going out w/before but decided he needed me and we went back out. I don't even want to talkto the fucker at all anymore. I'm so sick of everything. We fucking had a very special connection and he keeps fucking it up. I hate being a girl. I don't want to be anything. I just want to be a part of nature. Away from all the pain that guys inflict on me. I hate him. I don't know why he can't see. They'll just end up breaking up and he may regret it too, but fuck it, maybe they'll get fucking married. Fucking piece of shit. I'll never find the man that I so desperately need and want...

I guess I'm not "good enough for u.."