living in hicktown

This last Sunday Dave and I started officially going back out again. I don't know whether that was good of me to just say "Hey, just to let you know, we can go out now." I kinda wish it could've been romantic and everything happened so fast anyway.

We had sex for the first time in 3 months yesterday, only for it to end w/his stepdad walking in and being able to tell what we were doing. It would've been great if it wasn't for him. I hate his stepdad. I want him to die. His life is so much of a waste.

I'm worried about Dave, too. Ashley really fucked him up, made him insecure and very fragile. I told him I won't leave him, b/c I know how it feels to fear abandonment so much cuz I feel like I'm always being abandoned by someone. I told him I won't be an immature bitch like she was and try to run away from our problems instead of working them out. I told him I want to work out our problems and we will because I'm not going to leave him. I don't run like that stupid bitch b/c I love him too much. We both really need to get out of here, fast, before this fucking hick town swallows us alive. Everything's just been depressing lately w/him, and Chris keeps calling everyday.

Chris is in this psychward program and gets to come back to school on Thursday. The reason he had to go is b/c he tried to swallow a bottle of aspirin last Wed. or so, and his dad had made him start going to a counselor a week before and I guess he spilled it all out to him. He's not suicidal anymore though, I guess he just gets those weird thoughts sometimes.

Well, gotta get back to my essay. Too many people talking to me!