walking to nowhere

I got in a weird, self hurting, ass-like mood earlier about 1 1/2 hrs ago. So I went to my room and cut myself some. It felt good this time and looked good to me too. I was listening to some Manson, too, of course. I decided I would take a walk while listening to Manson on my portable cd player, so I got the courage to do it. It was a nice stroll. I felt like I was being followed by that weird looking lady-like manish thing, so I walked a lil' more then turned around and headed back on the other side of the street so I could watch her-him. I walked by Andy's house and wondered if he was home, and if he wasn't, what he was doing. Ray and them were playing outside. I had the urge to give one of those wicked smiles, not to them, (not to anyone, just to myself), for just about the whole time I was walking up and down the street (I went both ways, my house being in the middle). I noticed how many families lived in the newer homes of my street and many people were out. It was like I was judging them all, as the world's average society. That's why I was smiling, don't know if u could understand... Too hard to tell all of my thoughts. But when the Manson song came on and he said "When I'm god, everyone dies!" I gave the smile again and imagined me walking w/my hands barely spread out from me and everything I passed would burn up into a fiery hell and nothing would be left, but brown death.

Hope u liked this one.

(Uggh, I think butch let a big one.. I hope he dies...)