me and my car

Just got home about 40 min. ago from Ruby's aunts. She called me up at 5:15 today begging me to take her to the mall to play DDR since I got my car yesterday and I can drive it by myself now. I was reading my book for English, Prodigal Summer by Barbara Kingsolver, when she called, and I told her I would finish a chapter first then ask my mom if it was ok. So I left at about 5:40 after having Chris tell her online that I was coming, and we went there and stayed until 7:45. She and her aunt invited me to her lil' cousin's b-day party, so I said I guess I could stay for a few min. so I did. It was nice, her aunt and her family r nice and her cousins r so cute! I left there at 8:20 after calling my mom, telling her what was going on. I did almost kill Ruby though as I made a daring turn into her apartment place before this car going fast, but it didn't hit us, lol. Oh and I screeched my car for the first time turning left to go to the mall after I picked up Ruby, also. I wonder what all the drivers on the road think when I do that stuff, hehehehe. Just don't tell my mom! Ha.

So Dave did IM me last night and we talked for about 3 1/2 hours, starting at 11:30. He said how sorry he was for everything he did to me, and I yelled at him at some points and called him a fucking prick and all that for everything, but then, he started talking about what's been going on w/him and how his mom and dad hate him and won't speak to him anymore b/c of a stupid reason. We talked about his gf and shit too and about the past. He said he still thinks about things he misses about us and all that, and he did say that he would come crawling back to me if him and her ever broke up, but then he kinda took it back, so I don't know. But he prolly would. I told him he could buy me material things to help me feel better, lol, so he might, but he said he was tight on money. I'm trying to get him to buy me that black short dress from Hot Topic he said he would buy me like 3 months ago, but never did. Anyway, he made me feel that connection that we had, that close friendship, that was lost. Of course it made me want it back, and I was trying to figure out whether it was good to talk to him again or not, but by the end of our conversation, I decided I still can't talk to him in school, cuz he still made me depressed b/c he's so inlove w/her, but he actually told me how she thinks I'm pretty and shit. But oh well. I don't really hate her, only envy her. I just wish things could be good b/t me and Dave and we could be close again. Also, during our conversation I made the decision taht I just can't go out w/Chris, or anyone, b/c I only fuck things up and my stupid flaws will make him annoyed at me, and I don't want anyone else to be annoyed by me like I did w/dave. He said I complained too much, and I guess I did, and I'm sorry I came off whiny sometimes. I can't help it. I have reasons, therefore, I don't see the problem w/it, but oh well... I don't want to hurt Chris either, and I already got myself in too deep... I guess that's all I have to say about that.

I'm a lil' worried about Chris tonight too. When I was at Ruby's aunts house ruby IMed him and he didn't respond and just got off, and then I tried to call his house twice after I got home and it just went to the answering machine. He's not online now either, so I'm going to try and call him again tonight, and make sure no more fights happened b/t him and his dad. Maybe he's just busy reading though.

Tonight's Homecoming dance, and of course, I didn't go, cuz our school dances suck ass. Just a bunch of stupid slutty preps and stupid geeks going, thinking they can get asked my a guy to get danced w/(weird wording), but it never happens. People r so stupid. And they pick out shitty dresses too! I would wear sumthing much more elaborate than that shit, if I dress up, I like to go ALL OUT, cuz I love big dresses and fancy dresses, so screw them all. Btw, hope u have fun, Andy, lol.