partying to live-living in the party

I guess I should update again. I've been too busy w/life lately. Well, not really, just trying to disassociate myself from.. myself. "Myself keeps slipping away.."-NIN

All I wanna do is party, party to have fun, party to escape the loneliness, party to feel alive. What else is there to do? Sit on the computer playing Diablo II and getting online?? Ha, I do that still, but I don't exactly want to as much as I have in the past years. I want to have a life. I can't wait any longer. But if I keep this disassociating up, I won't be ready for the real schooling when it comes, the schooling that will really help me get a job.

"trying to save myself"