I'm finally living in reality

So I guess I finally did it. But of course he won't let me go. I'm almost afraid he'll stalk me and kidnap me and lock me away so I'll always be his. forever...

I'm sorry I hurt people. But I don't feel anything anymore. There's a lil' broken heart still burning a tiny tiny flame in those deep dark caves of myself, but it's not time for that to rise up again.

This is my time to relax. This is my time to forget. This is my time to make new connections; forget the old ones (loverwise). This is my time to appreciate who I really am. This is my time to really find myself.

I can't be w/someone while I'm doing this. I just can't. Doesn't anyone understand? Plus he annoys me and he does seem below me. I feel too bad to say it, that he's not good enough for me, but he just isn't. That's how I feel. I know that he has no one, but does that mean I have to be the one to stay w/him just because I was the one who was there in the first place? I just can't do it. I'm not the same. I'm still recovering. I know he needs me, but it's not right for me. I guess I should've never called him that night. I should've let things just drift away, and then maybe we could've found each other again, if it was meant to be.

I'm still right here. Just not in the way u want me to be.

Like Sheri says, I was living in illusions, now I'm facing reality. He needs to.